10 THINGS I LEARNED AND LOVE ABOUT SINGLEHOOD

April of 2013, I received a wonderful gift from the Lord and that is the gift of singlehood. Up until now, I am still caressing it with...


April of 2013, I received a wonderful gift from the Lord and that is the gift of singlehood. Up until now, I am still caressing it with pure joy because of the unexpected self discoveries that I am having.

In case you are in the same page as mine, you may want to read what I posted in my Tumblr account a year ago and know the reasons why I love it. These could be the reasons for you to love it too, instead of dreading it.

YOU DO NEED SOMEONE AND THAT SOMEONE IS JESUS. “Why don’t you find someone? Or perhaps, give those who show interest in you a chance?" I was often bombarded with those questions when I became single and I am thankful that God brought me enlightenment right away that I realized that I do not need anyone but Him. In Him you will find comfort healing and not in a new lover’s arms. With Him you can and will be anew and He will supply you with endearing and unconditional love that no admirer of you can offer. 

BEING ALONE IS NOT SYNONYMOUS WITH BEING LONELY. Having no partner made me realize that it is okay and enjoying being alone. Spending some me-time from time to time helped me to see foggy stuff clearly and positively. Indulging in positive solitude makes me realize a lot of things. Conquering circumstances and making decisions are the two things that I am afraid to do then but now doing it just like eating a piece of cake. Being independent was scary until I got the opportunity to be one.

TIME TO REDISCOVER AND GET CLOSE YOUR FAMILY. When I’m in a relationship, most of my times are spent with someone but when I became single, I found the chance to rediscover each and every one of them. We all have lives out of the four corners of our home so it’s nice that now I have every time in the world to listen to their stories and experiences. Not that we do not do that then, but we grew much closer now. Dates from time to time, ice cream sessions and movie marathons — just few of the things we love doing.

HANGING WITH FRIENDS WHENEVER. Hanging out with the best friend or with my whole girlfriends became often now unlike then. I am so glad that whenever we plan something, I don’t have to consult anyone (well, except my parents but they agree most often than not) whenever I’ll go somewhere.This basically helped me in healing and in my reincarnation. (becoming a new person, that is) During this season I learned how to appreciate my friends and I am ecstatic whenever the thought of how close we've been to each other comes in my mind.

THE SOCIETY’S UNDERSTANDING OF LOVE IS TOO SHALLOW. Well, based on my observation, people nowadays dig in to a relationship just because they are sad, because they want someone to be with them every time and anywhere, because they want someone to hug and kiss them. They tend to display their affections publicly and on facebook. Because of pouring my attention to Him and because of the influence of my sisters in Christ, I have the chance to understand the four words in the deeper and mature level.

FREE FROM DEFINITIONS AND OPINIONS OF ANOTHER. I can do everything without being judged. I can wear what I want, I can go everywhere. Embracing ‘me’ is the main thing in my mantra this season.

DISCOVERING YOUR PURPOSE. During this season, you can hear clearly what God is saying to you. As for me, I am still seeking the Lord so that I can see the evident mission He wants me to do.

SPENDING MORE TIME WITH THE LORD. Ah yes. No distractions at all. I can write in my journal and reflect. I can tell stories, hatred, disappointments to Him. Everything’s laid out to Him.

GROWING. I may not be growing in height, but I sure am growing in terms of my whole being and of course, spiritually.

GOD FIRST BEFORE SOMEONE. This is the major learning that I acquired in the season I’m into. To sum it up, here’s a quote I found in facebook: “The tragedy in our generation today, is that ladies would rather have a man of God than God himself; don’t be so eager to find your man of God, when you have yet to find yourself in God who made all man.”

As for now, God placed me in this season for me to have more experiences and discoveries that only I can discover. While it is in human’s nature to feel the need of being with someone, I believe that right now is not the perfect time. I suppose God is preparing me to that moment so that when it finally comes, I will be whole together with the man He destined me to be with and of course with Himself.

And in case you are in this season too, beloved, don’t dread this moment but instead hold it in your arms; cuddle it, feel it and most importantly indulge it.

“Each of you should continue to live in whatever situation the Lord has placed you and remain as you were when God first called you.” -1 Corinthians 7:17 

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All posts and photos are © Elaine Vidal unless otherwise stated. For collaborations, sponsorship and other concerns, you may contact me at waytogoelaine@gmail.com.